Greetings from Gracie,
My father died in 1990. Dad was a true patriarch and the cornerstone of my entire family. He was easily one of the smartest men I’ve ever known despite the fact he had to drop out of school and go to work to support his mother, brothers and sisters at the age of 13 when his own father died. He later earned his GED and always provided well for his family, including putting his six kids through college. He was a wise, kind, and gentle man that loved us intensely. We often thought of him as the peacemaker because he was the voice of reason and a beacon of guidance when any kind of strife or problems arose with us. We were very close and he left a huge void in my life, as well as the rest of the family members, when he died. Since Dad passed, I have dreamed of him numerous times. About 15 percent of the dreams go along these lines: He is very ill and I’m trying to get medical help to save him. In the end, I realize he is already dead and again feel stricken and experience the sharp pain of losing him. Thankfully, about 85 percent of the dreams go more like this: I’m having a wonderful visit with Dad. We talk about any multitude of things, laugh, hug, reminisce, just have a great time in general. At the end of the dream I’m usually hugging him goodbye when I realize he is already dead and then he vanishes as I’m holding him. I always wake up at this point feeling a tinge of sadness but also like I’ve just received a wonderful gift.
My mother is still living. She is elderly and has suffered a stroke. Her health is very frail but she is an amazing woman who still insists on living alone and always finds ways to entertain herself despite her greatly hampered mobility. Mother has always been a bit of a firebrand. She is not the one to go to for unbiased guidance. She loves her children unconditionally and only sees things one way. I always said she created her own reality…it’s only of late that I’ve become aware that we all do. She is absolutely fearless, sometimes recklessly so. (I’m afraid I got more than a touch of this from her.) While not scholarly, she has always been extremely clever and beautifully creative in almost anything she chooses to do.
Dream: The Family of Man
This dream was about both my parents. In this dream Dad was healthy and doing fine. It was Mom who was ailing; even more so than the fragile condition she’s in right now. I was visiting with them both. I was having the usual visit with my dad in that we were talking, laughing and enjoying each other’s company as we cared for Mom. Mom, though sick, was smiling and joining in as we talked about different things (all pleasant) that have happened over the years. This went on for some time but the specifics of any of these conversations escapes me now. What I do remember is laughing and thinking how blessed I was to have them as parents and how fortunate I was to have them with me. I then became a bit somber wondering how much longer Mom would be with us in her current condition. That’s when it hit me that Dad was already dead. I wasn’t hugging him this time. He was seated a few feet away from me and my head jerked up to look at him as that realization washed over me. This time he didn’t disappear. He smiled at me as he turned into a dazzlingly brilliant being of light that glowed where he sat for a moment and then shot out like a starburst in multiple directions. One beam passed through me, another through mother, and I knew that he was shooting out to others beyond us…to the rest of the family…to the family of mankind. I was filled with a sense of pure elation and total ecstasy as I knew that he was not dead. He ran through me, through mother, and through many, many others. I knew in the core of my being that he was an inseparable part of us (and something larger as well) and would be with us always. I also knew in that instant that it would be the same when mother passes, when each of us passes. So it is and so it has always been. O Death, where is your sting? Indeed!!!
I woke up holding that blissful thought.
Interconnectedly yours,
Aether Adventurer
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